This spring we decided to send T to a day care. We wanted her to interact with other kids independently and to spend time outside of home.
So the look out for a daycare started. First thing I did was to call friends who have experience in this , who are sending their kids to daycare though all of them are in far away locations so choosing these day cares was not feasible. I called them to inquire about what should I expect in a day care. The things that came up top in the list were space, hygiene,food and activities.
So we began our search for that perfect place where our daughter can go.It was her first exposure to the outside world so we wanted it to be pleasant.There is this private Montessori near our place. They run it in a community center. We paid them a visit and found that OK to start with.
first day T was so excited to go there, we told her she will be meeting new friends, toys. There will be her teacher. T was happy to go. I was happy to see her eagerness. Let me tell you T is potty trained. So we were relaxed on that part too.
So the first day I dropped her. She went inside the place and just as I was about to go she looked at me puzzled. I assured her that mommy will come to pick her up and in the mean time she can play with her friends and toys. She seemed OK we enrolled T for a half day program but decided to leave her for 2 hours in the beginning to give her time to adjust. Since the day care was in a community center it had a library too.I decided to wait there and when it was 2 hours I went to pick up T. As I reached there I saw T sitting on the chair and having her snack. She seemed fine. But as soon as she saw me , she started crying. It was fine as this was expected.
The next day T did not want to go. That was expected too because by now she was aware that mommy wont be staying with her in the new place. I coaxed her to go, reassuring that Mommy will come to pick her up once her school is over. That day when I took her back, her teacher told me she had peed twice in her pants. That was quite startling to me since T is potty trained and she juts stays for about 2 hours there. Moreover I make sure that she goes to washroom before leaving the house for the day care. Still I thought the place is new for her. May be she did not tell anyone as she may not be comfortable yet. I ignored it.
The next day the same thing happened. It became an every day thing. She used to cry daily that she does not want to go there and she used to wet her pants. The teachers told me every time that she had an accident. After her first week I asked T that why she does not tell her teacher if she wants to pee. To this she replied teacher say no when she asks her to take her to toilet. It was unbelievable. But I know my child, she is too young to lie. The next day this thing happened again. I questioned her teacher directly what my daughter told me and she replied they have too many children to take care of and they cannot take T every time she demands to go to the washroom! They have fixed washroom timings!! I was like what? They deliberately let her pee in her pants!! and what about this rule. Imagine if we are told to pee just two times while in office and that too at fixed time. Even adults cannot control the nature’s call. She is just a little kid! for god sake!!
Can you imagine having fixed washroom time and denying the child to pee in the washroom. How can they do this to my child. They left her no option but to pee in her pants. How torturous this must be for T everyday I could not imagine T’s trauma. It was too much. We decided to get her out of that place. The shocking thing was that two of the three teachers were Indians. How could they be so insensitive?
This was T’s first day care. She went there for two weeks after which we pulled her out. Now we are looking for some other place which will be loving, caring and sensitive to a child’s needs.
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And all that... 
I worked at a daycare a while back and my son attended so I could work there. The daycare overall was a pretty well run place but I had worked with someone I insisted needed to leave after the way she treated the children with me in there, and right before I quit due to some outside issues I found out that my sons teacher was fired and what she had done to the kids. I was livid and so upset that my son never let on what was happening. The big thing I can suggest when you go to choose a new daycare is to drop in unexpectedly and watch before you announce your presence. Also I would get a exact rundown of there schedule and when I check make sure they are on track so you know what is happening. You can interview other parents but even they like myself who worked in the daycare might not know if something is amiss. Trusting your precious child to a daycare is tough, but it does have benefits of preparing you child for school. I wish you the best of luck in your search.
Thanks for your valuable comment . Yeah this time I will be a bit more cautious. ” to drop in unexpectedly and watch before you announce your presence.” sounds like a brilliant suggestion!